Modern Dancing

For the last few months I've been going to a modern dance class once a week. It makes my body so sore but my heart and spirit so happy.

I danced ballet and jazz when I was younger but when I was about 12 my dance teacher died of a brain aneurysm. It was traumatic for me and I stopped dancing. My mom tried to get me back into a ballet class, but at 14 I was way too self-conscious about my body to go anywhere in pink tights and a leotard. It wasn't until my sophomore year in college that I got up the nerve to take a ballet class. I worked really hard and by the end of the year I had reached my childhood goal of "going on point". I discovered that I was really, really bad at dancing on toe shoes...and that ballet wasn't really my strong point (no pun intended ;).

Then in my junior of college year I discovered Modern Dance and fell in love with it. I think that if I had discovered Modern Dance my freshman or sophomore year of college I would have majored in it. I loved it that much. I still kind of wish that I had majored in Dance Education. Oh well.

What I love about modern dance is that it is all about individuality and creativity. It doesn't matter what type or size of body you have, how well you can do the steps, or how strong or flexible you are. Sure those things help make you a better dancer, but what really matters is that you discover the connection between your body and your soul and are willing to share it with others. I think the scripture in D&C 88:15 explains this concept by saying," And the spirit and the body are the soul of man". I think that is what makes dance such a powerful medium. It is the only art form where the artist is able to share not only their spirit with you, but also their body... and when those two are complete unified it is the most beautiful form of art because you get a glimpse into the soul of that person.

Dancing makes me feel better about myself and my body in a way that no other exercise or activity does. I once heard someone in church say that a God (I add in a Goddess) is a man (or woman) who is in perfect control of his (or her) body. That rings true to my soul and when I dance I feel my complete self; my whole being feels merged---my mind is connected to my body, my body is connected to my soul, and my soul is connected to my mind. It is a powerful feeling and one that only comes when my body and spirit have pushed themselves to their utmost physical and spiritual limits-- then in my exhaustion, my rhythm and my creativity I feel like my soul begins to shine and I get a glimpse of who I really am. I love it... it's an addicting feeling.

I guess that sounds a little strange... but if you've ever experienced that complete merging of your body and spirit (whether through running, sports, childbirth, intimacy, or experiencing nature) then you know what I'm talking about.

I hope I never stop dancing. I'd love to be one of those 75 year old women who is still moving, and by then I hope my body and mind will be very merged and that I'll have a powerful soul that I am in perfect control of.

Just for your enjoyment here is a video of my last modern dance final in college. It was a choreography class and I got to make up the movement. Jon and I had only been married for a few months and it was so much fun to work on this together. A few weeks ago we thought we'd try to see if we could still do the the "lifty whirly move" that we do here... we can't. After two babies my abs are definitely not as strong as they once were... I guess I'll have to work on that.
Also, remember this is modern dance... that means that you don't need to have music (you might want to turn your volume up so you can hear what we say) and it is all about creativity, movement, and relationships between people and not just looking pretty.

My favorite part is the "passion drive" part-- where I get to throw a tantrum. That sort of movement feels so good sometimes.